Sunday, August 10, 2014

Queen Me!! by Margaret Ullrich

Paul and I have just completed a quest.
It made Homer's Odyssey seem like a stroll around the block.

Ah, Odysseus…
His journey home to Ithaca after the fall of Troy took ten years.
Finding the perfect mattress, bed frame and sheets took us about as long.

We actually tested mattresses in both Canada and the U.S. 
The salesman in the states has even sent us some e mails.
We’re trying to figure out how to let him down gently.
Until then we’ll just detour around that state when we vacation.

We were upgrading from a double to a queen.
So that meant we also had to look at bed frames.
God, there are so many kinds of bed frames.
Some were quite impressive, complete with book cases and drawers.
Some were right out of a hospital’s colonoscopy prep room.
We decided on a simple headless, footless, wooden box with slats. 

The week before the frame was due we went to buy queen sized sheets.
We browsed them all - Sears, The Bay, BBB and a few specialty shops that made sheets out of I don't know what. 
We got a set of white sheets.
Since Winnipeg has a bed bug problem, the mattress and box spring had to be bagged and sealed before they could be taken away.
We picked up the plastic bags from Sears, went home, and had a drink. 
Some other time I’ll face a new duvet cover and new curtains.
Then, maybe, repaint the walls, look for a new carpet... 

Sears delivered the pieces for the bed frame on August 1, a little after 5 p. m. 
The mattress was scheduled for August 6. 
We wondered if they thought it would take us almost a week to build the frame.
It came with an instruction manual that gave us time goals for each step.

We added up the manual’s time goals.
People who knew what they were doing were supposed to build it in an hour.
We planned on at least three days.
We knew our limits.
Worse came to worse, we thought we’d pull out our sleeping bags and camp in the living room for a few days.

Day one - we read through the brochure.
We checked that we had received everything.
We examined and did a dry run of laying out the slats.
We checked that all the little holes were there and matched.
Yep, everything was in order.

Day two - a little messier.
The brochure was written for someone building the bed frame in a gymnasium.
We were working in our bedroom.
A bedroom that still had a double bed filling most of the middle of the room.

Okay, first get rid of the old bed.
We stripped the mattress and leaned it, and the box spring, against the wall.
Then the colonial bed frame was dismantled and carried down to the basement.

On to building the box frame.
That was easy enough.
Laying on the slats and and screwing them in were no problem.
Then there was the mitred trim which had to be screwed into the top of the slats.

One corner was fine, the other took a bit of tweaking.
Finally, done!!  
It had taken about an hour to put it together, just like the instructions said it would!
We laid the old mattress on top of the slats and went down for a drink.

On August 6 the moving men called early and arrived promptly. 
They noticed the labels marking our old mattress and box springs as an actual Eaton’s bedding set.
They realized they were practically removing an antique.
Eaton’s had gone out of business in 1999.
The bedding set had been bought a few years before that.
Before our young movers had been born.

We are now the proud owners of a queen-sized, soy-based, gel-plus memory foam mattress from Sears. 
Progress and an improvement in our lives.
Now Paul’s feet are no longer hanging off the edge. 
Life is good!

About tonight’s full moon in Aquarius...
It’s called Sturgeon Moon, Corn Moon, Red Moon, Green Corn Moon, and Grain Moon.

According to the folks at
Pay close attention to your goals, because this is a Super Moon!  ((The closest to Earth of three this year at 221,765 miles away.)  The next one is on September 9.  
The last new Moon in Leo on July 26 gave you a fresh start and asked you to assume more of a leadership role in your own life.  
This full moon gives you an opportunity to stand back and see how far you've come!

Let go of any activities adding an unwelcome load to your life. Organize a plan to maximize what's great about your life as you also make changes that will make you feel more comfortable.

Now it's crucial to focus on the needs of others, for Aquarius loves a team player! 
Pay extra attention to your friendships, groups or organizations. 
At the same time it highlights the value in doing your own thing. 
It’s your once-a-year chance to honour your authentic desires!

A full Moon in Aquarius is the best lunation of the year for breaking out of sexual ruts, and is such an amazing opportunity for sexual experimentation..
Get ready to completely buck convention! 
This summer's second Super Moon is in anything goes Aquarius. The whole weekend will be rife with opportunities for you to get your freak on, especially in the bedroom ... or, for that matter, any other place that turns you on!

Okay... Fresh start - we have a queen-sized bed.
We let go of our old double-sized bed.
Aquarius loves a team player... groups... break out of sexual ruts... buck convention... anything goes.
Oh, my!!!

Well, the new bed is going to get a rang dang do breaking in…
for starters!

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